don't be a douche

part of google’s “mission”, so it goes, is: “don’t be evil.” pardon my cultural relativism, but as a moral term, evil is very difficult to define. i advocate for something simpler. part of my personal mission is to NOT be a douche. this lofty proclamation was inspired by a recent bout of honchastic bullying. in a span of five minutes, the man was able to eviscerate any shred of goodwill he may have had left with me. douche! i want to tape record him and play it back to him next time he says “i guess you just didn’t understand what i wanted.” he must feel pretty good about himself having a bunch of idiots working for him. working for a bully is not character building. unless, of course, you build up the self-respect needed to walk out on him. in the meantime, the best strategy is to minimize interaction with the offending douche and remember that he is one sad, twisted mofo.