honchos, zen shit
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spitzer schadenfreude

I’m taking a bit of pleasure in Spitzer’s fall from grace. Not very Zen of me to delight in another’s misfortune. Why would I? Do I fear that I am a hypocrite in my own rite? Sure, … on some level, of course.

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The other part comes from having worked close up with very powerful men and seeing their sense of entitlement, the sense of impunity, and not caring about anyone other than themselves. Egos run amuck. It’s maddening to observe and feel like there’s no justice. Sure, they are miserable human beings with shallow relationships and no real self awareness or sense of peace. Yet they also put so much negativity and hostility out into the world. The societies they preside over become increasingly violent.

But who am I to judge? I’m ambitious and self-involved in my own way.

In moments like these, I return to the following idea from Emerson’s Self Reliance:

I do not wish to expiate, but to live. My life is for itself and not for a spectacle. I much prefer that it should be of a lower strain, so it be genuine and equal, than that it should be glittering and unsteady. I wish it to be sound and sweet, and not to need diet and bleeding.

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