the discussion has been raging at work, on the internets, out in the world. everyone has an opinion on this topic, and i’m no different. my scattered thoughts:
1. i do NOT subscribe to the myth that men need strange sex more than women. that is a fiction created and perpetuated by male dominated power structures.
2. i believe an attitude of entitlement is hard-wired into some men — depending on how they were socialized. similarly, an attitude of subservience is hard-wired into some women– depending on how they were socialized. if only we could balance out those two extremes, offset them on both sides, we’d have some more sanity in our world. men and women need to work together on that to make it happen.
3. spitzer, letterman, tiger … these guys suffered from a double threat: (1) the belief that they were invulnerable … they have so much power and influence that they assume they can control every aspect of their lives, and get away with reckless and unethical behavior. and (2) they surrounded themselves with yes men. an emperor’s new clothes type of situation. they received a false sense of security from sycophants who wanted nothing other than to preserve the status quo and their place in it. over and over — in ways subtle and blatant, people said yes to the mess even as the threat level was rising. they enabled and covered it up as long as they could, but to quote my man willy shakespeare, truth will out.
4. by putting oneself in the public eye, celebrities of all stripes forfeit any expectation of privacy. i’m not saying it’s “right” or “wrong” for the public to crave salacious details. or for paparazzi to stalk … i’m just saying that it is completely unrealistic for anyone to think they can have attention when they want it and turn it off like a spigot when they don’t. the human mind, the engine of the zeitgeist, doesn’t work that way. we, and consequently the world reflected back to us by the media, are driven by emotions, desires, memories, fears. we have active imaginations … minds that wander and explore. was it easier to be a “professional” when we could compartmentalize our worlds ala don draper? perhaps. we were also extremely limited in how we could express ourselves, how we could relate with others and what we could accomplish.
5. will i ever tire of asian television? i think not:
{ 5 comments… read them below or add one }
fantastic
I totally agree with you.
Plus, according to the Post, my paper of salacious record, Tiger is paying his wife $5M now and renegotiating their pre-nup to pay her many millions more to stay married to him for 2 more years, which puts her in the category of a high-priced call girl.
These guys also need better pr people. If they just came clean (pun intended) and fessed up, they would save themselves a lot of adverse publicity. it’s the cover-ups that gets them every time!
Charles “The Round Mound of Rebound” Barkley had it right, “I’m not a role model”. ‘Course, Tiger sorta was, which is why companies paid him so much money. Athletes, politicians and televangelists don’t have a monopoly on infidelity: Joe (and Josephine) Sixpack do it all the time. I used to do a ton of divorce cases, and people have lots of excuses for what they do. They’re all true and they’re all false. People- all people- are screwed up. I don’t watch a lot of golf, but when I do, it’s usually to see Tiger dominate. I’m more concerned about Tiger’s swing than his swinging.
people of all types cheat. men women rich poor. i get that. generally speaking, i find that those who cheat lack character and are not the kind of people i want close to me — as a boss, a coworker, a friend. perhaps that’s a harsh. but it has borne out enough times in my life … people who are emotionally dishonest in their intimate relationships tend to replicate that behavior in other ways, with people other thank just their partner. they may still be totally effective professionals, but i don’t want them as part of my inner circle. that said i am not proposing some kind of morality police. we all have to choose how to live our own lives. let she who is without sin cast the first stone. live and let live. that said, celebs cannot have their cake and have their cake too. they forfeit any expectation of privacy by putting themselves in the spotlight, regardless of whether they are actors, athletes, politicians or TV personalities.
Mmmm. Cake.