“Go for the Big Life — the Great Career, the Perfect Guy, and Everything Else You’ve Ever Wanted (Even If You’re Afraid You Don’t Have What It Takes) by Bonnie Fuller.
i don’t feel compelled to read the book, but i do delight in the idea of it. just this weekend i was at a wedding shower and a friend of my mother’s pulled me aside and told me i was wonderful and my mother is so proud of me, yadda yadda yadda. then she paused and sternly warned me: “but don’t forget to smell the roses.”
it was not the first time i had heard that one. older generations tend to think i am not enjoying my life because i am so focused on my career. they are wrong. i get a great deal of fulfillment and opportunity for self actualization from my career. and i have wonderful relationships. i have a full life with friends and family and diverse delights. i feel blessed that i had the wherewithal to stay independent and work on sorting out my identity before i got married and had kids and tried impose my unrealized dreams, hopes and fantasies onto others. there’s plenty of time to fall in love and, if i am lucky, have a family. i believe you have to let life unfold as it will, because it will. there’s no sacred script for how and when things should be done. we all have to find our own way.
besides, that whole desparate housewives scene just so isn’t me.
“That said, I am with somebody who really, really likes the fact that I have a sense of humour. It depends on the bloke and if he wants an equal, and the sexiness of banter, which is essentially a form of foreplay. I might have toned down my humour with men I fancied when I was younger, but not now.”
amen sister. i am there on not toning it down, whether or not it means lifelong singledom (which i don’t think it does).
a song by weezer, ‘freak me out’ describes the way i think many dudes have related to me and some of my friends.
i am so tired of silly scared boys. enough. where are the real men?
all things are cyclical. the good times, the bad. and the people. maybe not the specific people, but the kinds of people, at least. and interest levels. the ebb and flow. very much like my mtv consumption. sometimes mtv seems fun and fabulous, other times it’s a fascinating study of contemporary culture. and other times still — it’s utter, complete rubbish. now i know it’s me that changes, not mtv. cycles, seasons, to everything, turn turn turn.
i love business, and i’m good at it. yet there’s a very strong other side of me, where an artist resides. it’s the side of me that focuses on universal truths — the world beyond the next planning period. the particulars, the details, the specifics that we all seem to get mired in like a fly in shit is just … shit.
this desire to make contact with higher truths is what made me stop feeling anything very passionate with relation to politics, religion, etc. in recent years. i view those institutions and issues as a huge waste of my personal energy. call it what you wish, zen, peace, complacency, or just straight exhaustion. i don’t know what it is, but those things seem so trite, so ephemeral. which is not to say i don’t follow current events anymore. i do, but in a much more detached and accepting way. and the beat goes on, you know?
like picassso, i believe that “art is a lie that makes us realize truth.” art is the closest to truth that humans can get. the science crowd adds a lot. the science crowd takes the mystery out of a lot of things. but they will never take all the mystery out.
hello all. i am emailing from mailboxes etcetera on hudson street. i couldn’t get a time warner appointment until next weekend, so for the next week i shall be sans internet (and tv, and home phone). oi. BUT my cell phone works fine in the new place and i have my iTunes, Cds, newspapers and sirius radio to fill the media void for the next week. the move was as good as a move could be. the movers were very nice and helpful (big john’s on the upper east side) and nothing was lost or broken. the new place belongs to a friend and is truly wonderful. i feel so much more at home there than in my prior pad. even the movers were shocked by how small it was. they were off the boat immigrants and couldn’t fathom how i could have lived there for 3.5 years. my answer: the deferred gratification principle. it works. anyways, life is good. it’s a rainy sunday in january and i don’t even have the blues.
i like this summary of aristotle’s views on the good life. i took a class on aristotle in grad school and am fairly sure i am an aristotelian at heart. erin and i have been debating it for years. plato versus aristotle (who’s right), and which are each of us? here’s a bit i like:
Happiness, for Aristotle, is not something that comes to us from the outside. Rather, happiness is an inside job. Happiness is an activity, not a passivity (something that happens to you). It is an activity rooted in human choices. In other words, if someone is unhappy, it is because he has not chosen well. And if one is happy, it is only because he has chosen well. Remember, a good man is one who reasons well and chooses well. Hence, a good man is a happy man. Happiness, according to Aristotle, is going to result from making choices that promote the fullness of one’s nature. Now human nature has specific powers, namely, intellect, will, and the concupiscible and irascible appetites. And so human happiness is going to lie in the perfection of those human powers.
of the new job. so far so good. i need to step up and start learning how the business really works. i am scared, but that is good. i like a challenge. i want to grow and get better and this situation will absolutely help me do that.
what’s the same across industries: the corporate stuff. the boardrooms, the scripts, the changes, the powerpoints, the scrambling.
the difference: the the content is interesting as hell. in fact, there is nothing in the world i would rather be working on. i have a lot to learn, and i can’t wait to study it.
another difference: the honchos are dynamic … and quite badass. they are demanding and don’t settle for anything short of the best. and they are just cool. i know, very high school of me. but i can’t help myself. i’ve always wanted to hang with the popular crowd.
another difference: the press. the constant barrage of inquiries. not to me personally (yet) but to my bosses. we are, after all, a media relations department for a high profile company. i don’t desire a direct PR role. my job is PR, but in a indirect way and i prefer that.
so that’s my story and i’m sticking to it.