the fact that i haven’t been blogging is a sign of my improving physical and emotional health. it means i am talking to people. it means i am more engaged at work. it means i am working out more. it means i am sleeping. it means i am on meds. well, that’s what it means this week anyway. we’ll see how long it lasts.
so the trainer tonight. busted my ass. beat me up. but he was in a better mood, he did it with a smile so it felt better than last week, when he did it with a bit of a smirk. then he got into this whole thing again about how i’ve got the running down, the endurance, the weight training and if i’d only get my diet in line i’d be in sick shape in no time. this i know. i know i know. been there, done that and i think i may be heading that way again. still not on my way in earnest yet, though. still dragging a little. once i start to see some results i tend to get it together more. it would be cool to be thin again by summer. the world is so much kinder when you are skinny. doors are opened for you, literally and figuratively.
and, of course, the blondeness helps. at 8 am this morning, i was crossing 6th avenue at 52nd street and an extremely hot guy with a shaven head driving a pickup truck was stopped in traffic right in front of me. i completely checked him out, and held eye contact with him in the way i tend only to do when i am drunk and aggressive with someone in the crosshairs. he initially looked surprised, and then broke into a smile and said “good morning.” i giggled and he took off. totally made my day.
so the week. i feel light. things are easier. that wedding i was kvetching about last weekend, in fact, turned out to be lovely. buying a hot dress and having my hair done definitely helped. and just focusing on my friends and the people i loved, tuning out all the cheesy traditions and materialistic bullshit. it worked.
closing non sequitur: nick swardson on comedy central. fuckin hilarious. reminds me of my brothers, my cousin terrence and some of my friends from college.